Why you NEED to get a full length mirror (gentlemen)

Warning: Only keep reading if you have a good sense of humor and you are ready to look like a gentleman.

Ok guys, I think we can all agree that the whole "looking like I don't give a F*^k!" fad is a little too "22 and under" for us now right? You are a grown up and you should look like one. Chances are if you are reading this you know me or you at least know someone who knows me (hope this changes soon). If you are LUCKY enough to know me personally you know that I care quite a bit about my appearance and that I'll pretty much try anything in the world of fashion at least once. This post will not discuss why you need to go out and purchase a bow tie and bright red pants. I am going to point out some necessary wardrobe pieces that will help you look and feel amazing... and I will discuss how you can find what is most fashionable for yourself and for that special someone you are trying to get sexy for.

Step one: Know your size. Please stop trying to cover up for what your body type is or isn't by wearing clothing that is too tight or too loose fitting. An ill fitting garment will only draw too much or too little attention to yourself in a very negative way (in general). I discuss this in a previous post at length so I won't harp on it too much.

Step two: What ever gentleman needs in his closet (this is like the BARE MINIMUM). Providing all these items fit I would suggest ensuring you have the bases covered:

- 1 pair dark black slacks (not the washed look "trendy ones"... big boy pants)
- 1 pair light or medium tan chinos (if Dockers fit your frame...)
- 1 pair medium wash regular or slim fit denim pants "jeans" (NOT SKINNY JEANS)
- 1 pair medium brown or olive shorts (no cargo shorts here, you don't need extra pockets for juicy fruit and pez dispensers)
- 1 fitted white button down oxford style shirt
- 1 fitted button down light to medium blue shirt
- 2 to 5 plain white under shirts that fit well (preferable v-neck... don't let that white show past the collar)
- 1 pair black dress shoes and belt to match
- 1 pair light to medium brown shoes and belt to match
- 1 pair tan or white canvas sneakers (I love me some Chucks or Van's Old School's)
- 1 Dark Navy or black tie
- 1 Gray or Navy Blazer
- 4 to 5 pairs of socks from www.happysocks.com (don't be skurred)
- 1 Pair of running shoes (get your ass out there and run dammit!)

Step 3: Learn how to pair the above items. How many outfits can you put together using these simple items from your wardrobe? Standing in front of your mirror and putting on your black pants with your brown shoes and belt and a white shirt and tie. Does that combo feel "comfortable" to you? If you don't feel good in what you're wearing... you won't be able to "skeet skeet" confidence from your pores like a PRO. Get crazy and roll up sleeves and wear a button down with your shorts and sneakers, you'd be surprised how you can make the above items all your own. I personally suggest finding some way to keep track of your favorite outfit combinations (use your smart phone and you'll find some good closet apps out there).

Step 4: Expand the wardrobe. Once you are comfortable with the basics, you will probably start noticing how you can throw in some patterns like argyle or simple stripes to add some personality to an otherwise basic outfit. Here's your chance to try out those green chinos that you found on clearance or www.jackthreads.com. Do NOT be afraid to try something new, if you like you can even email me a pic and I'll tell you if it's lame or not (in my opinion). Worst case scenario is you look like crap and someone says something. You're a MAN, you can handle a little constructive criticism remember?

I'm not really sure what makes me so interested in providing this type of advice to my fellow tripods, but I definitely think that Dean Martin and John Wayne would not be super happy with how some of the male species are presenting themselves these days. This has NOTHING to do with sexual preference or gender for that matter, it has to do with taking the time to show the world you are displaying yourself to that you indeed DO give a F*^k and you know how to dress yourself. Also, I've heard that ladies tend to find it quite attractive to watch a man tie a tie... just sayin. You'll find a lot of lists like this one out on the web from perhaps more qualified individuals... but I assure that this is the only one that has posted the writer's willingness to personally critique your outfit choice and give you some constructive feedback. I'm also fairly certain this is the ONLY article you'll find that mentions running SHOES in the wardrobe list and no running CLOTHING of any kind, there by partially endorsing nude running (which I'm fairly certain is a bad idea to partake in unless you are 100% sure that you are not in violation of state and
local laws).

So go out there and have fun with it MEN. I'll be looking forward to the overflow of super dope outfit pics in my inbox soon!

Sweet Thunder... ROLLIN OUT! (<----- p="">you like that?)

A One Track World (or: Music killed the video star and my soul)

I was quite recently inspired to actually write something that mattered about a subject very close to my heart. After two important encounters with some loved one's in my life I've come to accept the reality of the music world today. In a conversation with my band about a week ago as we were trying to assemble a track listing for our next album someone said "that doesn't really fit in with the whole album", to which I replied "no one cares about albums anymore".

Gone are the days when you would here "Spiderwebs by No Doubt" on the radio and run to Sam Goody or Zia to buy Tragic Kingdom and go home, pop it in the old discman and lay on your bed flipping through liner notes and maybe hopping on to AOL (click , chirp, buzzz, DING) and looking up their tour dates to see when they were coming to town. Instant gratification, iTunes and Starbucks have changed our musical society into "I'll just get the free track download and maybe buy the radio hit". I feel like my love of my favorite recording artists today stems from knowing that they (like myself) have written crappy songs along side the good ones. Albums add a human element to a recording artist. An album seeing someone's wedding day right next to a picture of their graduation; perhaps a stack of their divorce paperwork and death certificate.

I feel no need to record a theme in my album anymore, as I write songs that span genre and subject matter like I make sandwiches (sometimes with PB, banana and avocado). I used to tell people "when you just buy that one track you are putting 3 cents into a "rock star's" pocket that he is using to feed his kids, but when you go to their show and buy a shirt and a CD you are giving them like $40". Now my attitude has changed. I've kept a day job and given up on the idea of ever touring again. As a musician the new goal is to write a hit song that the next Mickey Mouse club member that turns 16 may be asked to record because it would be a great background for the new Chevy commercial. The pipe dream is to get my song onto an episode of Modern Family... I mean... talk about MAKING IT! I can't say I'm not a little jaded and butt hurt by the whole thing, but it is a little hard to switch gears so quickly. There's a reason the "drummer" in the Lumineers wears the same white t-shirt and suspenders, that's all he can afford. Why do artists ask you not to record their show? They don't get to make money on that video you post on YouTube. Imagine someone coming to your house and making sandwiches for their whole family then walking out without paying you or even offering a bite... that's what your video is kinda like.

I hope there's still a little hope out there for a whole album, but I kinda know that the music world in that way is dead. So... want to hear a song I wrote?

Love ya,

-D

Fear of letting go

I have most likely figured out the meaning of life again... so sit down and grab a cup of tea (or what ever it is you drink/eat when you are about to have your mind BLOWN).

There always seems to be the same conversation points that come up with any big life event; death, birth, marriage, divorce. People seem to have this idea that change is inevitable and scary and that you have to just "let go"... or "don't be afraid to let go"... "take a leap of faith" (you get the idea). I personally don't think one has to change or take any type of proverbial "leap". I've been into the idea that humans are more like water than we are like rock; flowing in and around each others lives occasionally merging into larger and strong streams or rivers. We don't HAVE to let go because the "letting go" is done for us and with out choice. When a loved one departs our lives in some way we don't really choose it, so you don't really have to let go because you've already been pulled away and started to flow as a separated stream again. Maybe your stream will join up again and maybe you'll just flow farther and farther apart.

Here's where the fear goes away for me: I can't control how I let go but only how I react to being separated. I can choose to continue to be myself and act like nothing happened, or I can now act as this new body of water whose trajectory has changed slightly. Or I could go buy a case of PBR and some Tom's shoes and flip off the world while listening to "Imagine Dragons" thinking I'm some kind "cooler than you" person whom is DEFINITELY NOT A HIPSTER. I believe the latter of these options is destructive to myself and to the community in general.

Sometimes life sucks and we need to just have a crappy day. I think it's ok to be hurt and to feel like you want things to be like they were yesterday, but we CAN'T STAY THE SAME (re: Christopher Conley & Saves The Day from the Album Under The Boards). Be afraid, feel it and deal with it. After the fear has become part of yourself, you can deal with it daily until it seems to just fade and you're back to playing Super Nintendo and drinking whiskey. I'm sure you've already picked up on this, but this entire post is essentially an acronym for the abundance of PRE-FATHER'S DAY SALES that are going on in the mall right now. Get out there and get your Pa and the other Pa's in your life a super sweet gift at up to 75% off! And while you're at it... grab me a gift certificate for www.thetiebar.com because daddy needs to look good!

Hope you guys are able to let go and have a good and relaxing SUPER HOT day.

Love ya,

-D